


Jessie

by UberNerd



Category: Buzz Lightyear of Star Command, WALL-E (2008)
Genre: Crossover, Crossover Pairing, Energy Vampire, Gen, Robots
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-12
Updated: 2016-09-12
Packaged: 2018-08-14 17:16:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8022397
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UberNerd/pseuds/UberNerd
Summary: Darwin and Fletcher have to work together to take care of a fake child for their home ec class.





	Jessie

Fletcher typed the code into the keypad on the front door, unlocking it for himself and Darwin. Fletcher wore a warm plaid jacket with white wool lining while Darwin sported his usual cargo shorts, t-shirt, and cap, both toting backpacks. After they crossed the threshold and closed the door, Fletcher pressed the button on the intercom and announced, “Darwin and I are home.”

“I’m just in the den!” Nos-4-a2 called down the hall to their right.

“That’s weird,” Darwin mumbled, “He’s never out of his office.”

Fletcher hissed with laughter. “Mom started watching some reality show, and he’s been trying to catch up in secret. I guarantee he’ll be sitting directly in front of the turned-off holoscreen with his work tablet open to some random page when we walk in.”

“Wait, what show is it? _Cupcake Combat_? _Axiom’s Got Talent_? _Twin Housewives_?”

“Eh... why do you ask?” Fletcher cocked an eyeform.

“Oh, like you _haven’t_ watched them,” Darwin scoffed.

“Um. No. I haven’t.”

“Jeeze, no wonder your dad hides his watching habits, you judgemental... judger.”

“...Uh-huh. Smooth.”

They entered the living room to find Nos just as Fletcher predicted. The tall Energy Vampire turned around in the sofa to face them, tossing his tablet onto the coffee table.

“Hello, boys. Welcome home. How are you?” Nos tried to emit a casual wavelength, but Fletcher could sense an underlying turmoil, a masked anticipation. He was waiting on tenterhooks, and seemed less than pleased by the interruption.

“Fine, I guess,” Darwin chuckled as they came around the sofa. Fletcher took the spot to Nos’s left, and Darwin sat down in the armchair beside them. He dug into his backpack to pull out a baby doll, plopping it onto the table.

“Man, careful with that...” Fletcher grimaced, lifting it off the table to cradle it in his arms.

Nos looked back and forth between them, but failed to work out an explanation. “Mind filling me in?”

“This is Jessie,” Fletcher held the doll out toward his dad. It was plain, bald, and wore only a white diaper.

“It’s our home ec project,” Darwin expanded, “and I didn’t think we were naming it?”

“Not it, _them_. And of course I did, what’s the fun in this dumb project if we don’t put some thought into it?”

Darwin rolled his optics.

“Wait, this is that project where you have to take care of a fake child? I had no idea that was still in practice outside of old Earth media,” Nos smirked.

“Well, it is, and we got to choose our own partners. Not that it made much of a difference... everybody else thought I was going to eat the baby,” Fletcher scowled.

“Oh, I’m sure that isn’t true ‒ ”

“Actually,” Darwin interrupted, “they said so. Out loud.”

Nos-4-a2’s face fell. He looked at Fletcher, but the hybrid’s focus was entirely centered on the baby doll, and his electrical signature was too well guarded to glean any useful information.

“Who cares about any of that anyway? Wait until you see all the stuff we have to do to take care of them!” Fletcher held the doll in one arm and started pulling equipment out of his backpack with the other. “They gave everyone the same stuff whether the couples are robot, human, or mixed... to teach us all the same ‘ _responsibility_ ’ or something. Bottle, pacifier, diapers, blanket... everything has little sensors in it that communicate with Jessie! When we turn them in on Monday, the teacher will download their memory to see how well we took care of them.”

“How do you know when it ‒ or, they, need attention?” Nos asked.

“They’re all set to turn on at five o’clock tonight, at which point they’ll start making all sorts of noise,” Darwin frowned, “so our weekend ends there.”

“Don’t listen to Dadwin, Jessie,” Fletcher crooned.

“ _Dadwin?_ If I’m Dadwin, who are _you_ supposed to be?”

“Dad, obviously.”

“ _What?!_ ”

“Alright boys,” Nos laughed, “I’ll let you take the holovision for your last few hours of freedom. I still have some... er... work to take care of, so I’ll be in my study. Will you be spending the weekend, Darwin?”

“Oh, no,” Darwin shook his head, “Fletcher’s keeping the baby tonight, then I’ll pick it up tomorrow at noon, then Fletcher will take it back the same time on Sunday.”

“Sounds like a plan,” Nos stood up, “I expect you to take good care of ‘Jessie!’ Another failed assignment, Fletcher, and your grade will fall into ‘lost privileges’ territory.”

“Aw, what? Why are you trying to take the fun out of raising a child?”

“Fun?” Nos pat the top of Fletcher’s head, “Sure, babies are lots of fun! Happy parenting, you two. Hope you weren’t planning on resting this weekend.”

Fletcher watched him leave the room before shaking his head. “Who needs that negativity? This is gonna be a breeze.”

“Yeah... but about the names, Fletchdad... Dad-er... um... Pop-fletch...”

“Not gonna happen, Dadwin.”


End file.
